[ adapted from a "Handling Difficult Employees" webpage so some points need translation to the cell group situation ]

SYMPTOMS	SUGGESTED ACTION PLAN
The Complainer · Voices lots of complaints but few, if any, suggestions. · Even imagines problems. · Appears blameless and innocent · Feels he/she must get personal opinions across. · Gets worse if ignored. · Includes disillusioned youth and perfectionists.	1. Try to find the cause. 2. Listen; do not agree or disagree. 3. Avoid accusations. 4. Ask specific questions. 5. Stick to the facts. 6. If their complaints are job-related, determine whether they’re unable or unwilling to perform the required duties. 7. Take appropriate action.
The Subversive Sniper · Often wants to “move up.” · Seeks to undermine their supervisor (you) and make him (you) look foolish. · Is extremely passive-aggressive. · Puts on a friendly face but “snipes” behind your back.	1. Make it clear that you are aware of his/her ways. 2. Give specific, job-related orders. 3. Set necessary limits regarding behaviors that won’t be tolerated.
The Busybody · Is a professional meddler. · Believes he/she knows everything (and is usually wrong). · Likes to drop-in anytime to gossip and relate their latest “discovery.”	1. Visit him/her privately. 2. Help this person see how whispered charges hurt the whole unit. 3. Do NOT act like a prosecutor with a hostile witness. 4. Keep him/her busy, leaving little time to gossip. 5. Focus on the problem-its impact on their work and that of others-and take necessary corrective action.
The “Maybe” Person · Talks a “good game.” · Usually doesn’t produce. · Procrastinates, hoping a better choice will present itself.	1. Pinpoint work objectives; tie him/her down in advance; and cover “who does what for whom and by when.” 2. Make your expectations clear. 3. Seek any other causes. The source isn’t always shiftlessness; sometimes they might be acting out of fear, inability, confusion or boredom. 4. Determine what’s applicable and take appropriate action.
The “No” Person · Is sometimes a perfectionist. · Avoids mistakes at any cost. · Loses hope and share feelings with all when things go wrong. · Extinguishes hope in others, smothering all creative sparks.	1. Employ compassion and patience, not contempt. 2. Use him/her as a resource for others. 3. Use this person as your personal character-builder. 4. Run new ideas past this person for critique before moving ahead.
The “Explosive” Employee · “Blows up” if threatened. · Needs to prove himself. · Has concrete answers for everything. · Opposes any variations in process. · Becomes irritated and impatient if plans are resisted. · Deals with all others in the above manner.	1. Don’t expect change. 2. Let them run down, then regain their control after they explode. 3. Show them you take their opinion-and others’-seriously, and that there’s a need to respect all equally.
The “Belligerent Aggressor”  · Bullies his/her way to achieve what they want. · Embarrasses co-workers, thinking they’ll gain support of others. · Throws temper tantrums. · Tries to make supervisor (you) feel you’re doing poorly when you’re actually doing well.	1. Use self-control and be consistent. 2. Do NOT let them pressure you into doing what you don’t want to do.  3. Confront but do NOT oppose their accusations of you. 4. Anticipate challenges. 5. Practice what to say. 6. Respond with caution. 7. Set a time to deal with the situation.
The Harasser · Personally attacks co-workers. · Avoids the real issue. · Tries to set others up as “opponents” to impress their superior (you). · Cannot be objective.	1. Establish and maintain a meeting plan to discuss the concerns. 2. Do NOT allow the discussion to drift. 3. Keep discussions to the point. 4. Refocus conversations as necessary.
The “Green-Eyed Monster” · Distinguishing mark is jealousy. · Believes he/she should have something not earned. · Reacts with spiteful behavior when others get raises or promotions.	1. Keep conversations friendly and professional. 2. Avoid being dragged into an argument. 3. Always remind this person that everyone is evaluated or assessed according to their own efforts.

summary checklist:

1. Remain positive;

2. Be direct, descriptive and non-judgmental;

3. Be prepared with facts, not gossip or rumors;

4. Address the problem, don’t attack the person;

5. Maintain eye contact (also be aware of your body language);

6. Watch your tone of voice and timing; and

7. Focus on the message, restating it as appropriate and necessary.

additional guidelines:

1. Realize that the behavior is often predictable. Look for patterns.

2. Expect that behavior will impact others.

3. Know when to withdraw and turn to experts such as medical and psychological professionals (even if you do some personal counseling).

4. Try to discover the root causes of the problem so they can be addressed most appropriately, either by you or other professionals.

5. Do NOT try to provoke them into quitting or getting fired. Most people are worth saving with some coaching and a solid approach to getting them to change or to accept help.

6. Always deal with the issue of their performance rather than criticizing them personally.

Other Article:

To understand an individual's behavior, we must first know what motivates them. No two individuals have exactly the same motivation. People are either motivated by their needs or values. A needs motivation includes love, growth, security and physical needs. A values motivation encompasses the beliefs and principles we have developed over our lifetime. In addition to motivation, self-esteem and attitude can also affect a person’s outlook. Your challenge is to identify, understand and work with a difficult person effectively. Though you cannot change an individual, you can control your own reaction to the person and understand what causes their behavior. Let's take a look at different types of difficult people and how to deal with their behavior.

Suzie Silent usually responds with one-word answers (yes, no, maybe) and is very tight-lipped. People like this typically do not participate in conversations and will not reveal why they are quiet even when asked. These individuals tend to be shy and afraid. To work effectively with them it is best to ask open-ended questions. Show appreciation for their positive work and praise the behavior you want to reinforce. Also allow enough time in conversations for them to respond, and do not interrupt the pregnant pause.

Nate Negative is the chronic pessimist. He always sees a problem without a solution. Because of his low self-opinion he feels powerless in most situations. He creates power by making a mountain out of a molehill. His negativity can pull the morale down within an organization at a very rapid rate. To work effectively with him, present the negative aspects before he does and then provide positive alternatives. Be optimistic. Do not be drawn into his negative opinions or argue and debate with the individual. Whenever possible, give Negative Nate time to think through your discussion. Though it is important for him to save face and time, re-evaluating a discussion often lets him bow out of negative position.

Annie Agreeable can be overly flexible in her effort to be liked and to get what she wants. She can be personable, over committed and a soothing delayer. Annie is frequently an extrovert who will avoid disagreements at all costs. To work effectively with her, be nonthreatening. Ask for her opinion and solutions which will help her analyze a situation. Be aware of her over-commitments and help her monitor and manage her schedule. Make it non-threatening for her to be honest about her opinions and feelings. Hold her accountable for her commitments and part of any project.

Freddie Fault-Finder tends to complain about others and whine constantly. He seldom takes responsibility for his actions and will place blame for his failures on the shoulders of other people. He feels helpless to fix any problems and is a perfectionist at heart. Freddie is not only critical of you and others, he also very self-critical. To work effectively with him, listen carefully at first, as difficult as it may be. Interrupt and ask for clarification and specifics, not generalizations. Guide the conversation toward resolution of the problems with specific alternatives and solutions. And finally, acknowledge his feelings.